Stomping Grounds: I Haz Them

A glimpse into adult life: New room, building IKEA furniture, desperate victory. Not sure who writes those instructions, but they have a sick sense of humor sometimes. Ah well. It's almost Christmas, how the heck did that happen? I really feel like I've been both here forever and that I've just arrived. I've been here four months and about a years' worth of things have happened, I'd say!

As you may interpret from the above picture, I finally found a permanent flat! Whew! It's in Kreuzberg in the Graefekiez (Graefe neighborhood). I'm walking distance from two different U-Bahn (subway) lines going two directions, a bus that goes to the main train station and a big park called Hasenheide, which I unfortunately will not make much use of until winter is over. In my neighborhood so far I've discovered a tiny little falafel stand called King of Falafel, run by one man who makes the falafel fresh himself and lays out each vegetable, hummus, etc. into the perfect place on the pita before rolling it all together into delicious perfection for 2,50 EUR. There is also Vegoloumi there (vegan haloumi cheese). My current obsession though is a place called Hamy, a thai food restaurant that has a tiny menu and two specials every day, always delicious with some sort of curry sauce and tons of fresh veggies on top. I have probably spent an entire paycheck on pineapple-coconut milk shakes and thai curries since I've moved in. Berlin has a lot of good food to be eaten.

Three months of searching have paid off in that I have an good-sized room with two big windows, big kitchen, living room with balcony, bathroom with bathtub and a guest WC. I live with 3 other women in a cool area for 300 EUR a month with utilities. While much cheaper can be found in Berlin, for where and what it is, I think I've done well. We're sitting on an old contract so somehow that's kept the gentrifying and thus rent-skyrocketing at bay. Now I just need visitors. It really needs to be spring so I can explore more. I have lots of plans involving myself and the future bike I'm going to buy. And food. And coffee. Graefestrasse and Dieffenbachstrasse, the former which I live on, seem to be filled with lots of cute bars, cafes, etc. with cool lighting. So pumped!

My new room was empty, which means I've been learning to do lots of things like buy and figure out how to get furniture into my apartment without a car or tons of money. I also painted my first wall (green!), bought my first screwdriver (fancy!) and drilled holes into the wall with minimal screaming to make a contraption with metal wire and hooks for curtains. I somehow didn't ruin everything! If buying furniture and painting a wall is not a sign of my commitment to stay in Berlin, I don't know what is! One of my new years resolutions is going to be to learn to be more handy. On this list is to stop being so scared of the power drill, install floating fake wood flooring over my ugly ass floor and to learn how to fix a bike and/or tell what's even wrong with it. I'll get back to you on this. Apparently I've lived a kept life until now.

On the job front things are...heated. I have two jobs. The first is an office job at a school that runs an executive MBA program for people in creative industries. I love this job and they're helping me expand my visa so I can do other things in addition to teaching. However, after my intensive Rostock course my teaching job decided to give me some classes in kitas (kindergartens). Normally there are two intensive weeks of required training for this, but they decided I was a quick learner and sent me off to teach my first day of classes after less than two full days of training. Actually I think I observed four 45 minute classes and taught one while being observed. While it is flattering and I did fine....I decided I absolutely hate teaching children. Give me grammar, rude adults with iPhones and forced company classes any day over this. Luckily I only teach Mondays right now, but am trying to get out of my contract as soon as possible without causing drama so I can go back to adult-land. You live, you learn, yeah? If I have to sing the Good Morning Song one more time I'm going to kill someone. Kudos to all you kindergarten ESL teachers out there, I don't know how you do it!

I am heading back to Prague for Christmas and likely New Years to stay with some friends and I'm pretty excited to be back on my old stomping grounds.  I plan to eat a lot of langoše and trdelník before the Christmas markets are gone! The German Christmas markets are pretty epic (Germans are obsessed with Christmas), but I love me some fried things!

See you in Prague?

Back in Berlin for good!

Berlin Dome

 Wow, I am finally back in Berlin and my life is slowly coming together! I still need to find a permanent flat, but I even almost have a weekly routine schedule! So, updates!

#1 Flat

I thought getting a job would be the hardest thing here, but I managed to find two jobs relatively quickly and am still working (3 months later) on finding a long-term flat. Basically, my experience of my flat search is sort of like a really, really long tour of Berlin. I've stayed with two friends and in two sublets so far + my 7 weeks in Rostock. I have this current one until 1. December and we'll see what happens from there! The whole thing basically seems like an awkward, warped form of dating. I obsessively check the flat websites, send out lots of messages telling people about myself and responding to what they said about them, get answers to about 10% of my e-mails and invited to view about half of those answers. I go and get a tour, make awkward small-talk and sometimes make friends who want to bake cookies with me, but still no flat! Either the flat ends up being weird or I wouldn't want to live with the people! Though my budget is actually pretty reasonable for Berlin, I am being very picky with location. I really do want to settle in Berlin and moving is traumatizing so I'd rather wait out my future I-get-a-really-good-feeling-about-this room in a flatshare (WG). Hopefully I'll get something soon as I just want to unpack, buy lots of things you wouldn't while living out of a suitcase (re: spices, curry paste, kitchen appliances, boots that take up space, big sweaters). I've been in Germany three months now and still feel so unsettled on this front!

The difficulty is in part because there are three years' of people looking for one year of flats! Something with the German school system changed so that two years of people are going off to uni (and hence looking for flats) at once. On top of that, men no longer have to do a required 9 months in the military so a whole year of guys is added in to this mix as well. Competition!

#2 Jobs

I have two jobs now! Job A is still at the same school that gave me the intensive course in Rostock, but now I've picked up a few classes in Kitas (Kindergartens) around Berlin. I really don't have much experience with little kids, but they've given me a couple classes with slightly older children they said were especially fabulous and thought I'd be a great fit for, so we'll see how it goes. One of them is reaaalllyyy far outside Berlin and will take me 1.5 hours each way to and from for a 45 minute class. I got a giant tote bag full of material, flash cards, stories, CDs, ideas for games and an overview of what should be taught by the end of the month so I think I'll be okay on that front. I was invited to observe a class last week and got some surprise observed teaching. Basically I walked in and the teacher handed me some color flashcards and a stuffed animal and said, "Plan an activity with these colors and work in some conversation with this cuddly toy! I'm going upstairs to get the kids right now, be back in a minute!" Terrifying, but I did well and survived somehow. Mostly I'm just concerned about setting routines for the class in the beginning and making sure everything doesn't explode into pandemonium, as disciple is an area I need to improve on as someone who's mostly taught adults and/or older over-achieving preteens.

Job B is with a school that teaches CEOs and other high-ranking people from creative business industries (marketing, advertising, TV, radio, etc.). My job here is actually not teaching, but stalking people online and entering lots of info into their database to get more students, plus some help with their social media sites/Google Ad-Words stuff. I actually got this job through a friend from my university in the States, who knew someone who knew someone in Berlin. My main bosses are all American and really chill and the atmosphere in the office is cool because it is a constant switch between English and German happening all around me. Though data entry is perhaps not the most exciting thing in the world, it's actually nice compared to the uncertainty and performance aspect of teaching as for this job I am in the same place all day and have a relatively simple task. They're also writing me letters to allow me to expand my visa so I'm allowed to do more than just teach and the office looks out over a river and some really cool old-looking factory buildings in Alt-Moabit/Tiergarten.

Both of my jobs seem to really like me, which is great. Job A even said once I get my visa expanded they would maybe like to have me help with stuff in the office as well. I'm super pumped about this as I want to eventually go into a career in educational management (a.k.a. I want to work in an educational environment, but in the end not as a teacher/professor…ideally in the study-abroad industry). I have a good mix of teaching and positions that are giving me more experience behind the scenes of teaching, so I feel like my future is looking alright, and both jobs have expressed interest in giving me more responsibilities in the future. Right now the teaching experience is also great as I feel like I need to throw myself into teaching before I can advise other people on such things!

#3 Life

Life is overall good! Happy to be back in Berlin, though am glad I did the course in Rostock. I just find Berlin much more inspiring overall. My only issue now is the flat search and wanting to just start getting my life feeling settled! Once that happens I'll be much more open to visiting friends and traveling a bit more. Wish me luck!

I've been going to a lot of Volksküche (The Peoples' Kitchen) with friends, both in Rostock and now back in Berlin, and I love them. Basically you go, often to a housing collective or squat, and for 2-3 euros you get a three course meal. Everyone eats the same thing and occasionally it's dumpster-dived, but always delicious, usually vegan and super cheap! I went to one last weekend for vegan brunch and there were literally 20 different dishes and delicious coffee with organic soymilk. Mmm. Overall there is a lot of good food to be had in Berlin!

Speaking of dumpster-diving, I was invited to go with someone in Berlin soon. Will be an adventure! Free food!

Friend Tine, me and friend's flatmate at a Vokü in Rostock

Besides that, notable things are having my visa card stolen from the mail and 1500 EUR charged on it = successful first time at the Berlin police to make a police report, all in German! Luckily I got the money back a few weeks later. I've also been to the roller derby twice in Berlin! Basically this is girls on skates beating each other up. I'm still trying to learn the rules, but so far I'm pretty content just watching people fall down on skates to music while drinking beer and watching the mascot (called the "I Don't Care Bear"). I guess I should watch the movie with that girl from Juno...

Bad blurry picture of the roller derby: Berlin vs. London

Bis bald (until soon)!

Teaching in Rostock Updates!

Wow, have I been busy! Teaching an intensive course for 7 weeks is taking it's toll! I'm really rather getting the hang of it though. We have quite the little routine. Warmer, review the grammar we did yesterday, new grammar lesson, textbook activities and then English trivia or music quiz with the occasional test or field trip thrown in. My life is sort of boring as all I talk about is teaching or looking for a flat, which is all I do lately. I'm quite looking forward to just sleeping an entire week when I'm done, sitting around on the internet in my pajamas, drinking tea, watching horrible TV and cooking the extravagant meals I haven't had time to cook with this job!

Speaking of teaching, I've collected a few good anecdotes. First, during a lesson on modal verbs, I had my students write "Dear Abby" letters asking for advice and then I switched the letters and had them answer each other using "should", "could", etc. I have the younger class. I'd say most of my nine students are in their early 20s or 30s. Hence, these were the result:

"Dear Abby, I want to be an erotic film star, but my friends say I am too square to do this. They tell me I should be an erotic film producer instead. What should I do?"

"Dear X, I think you should be an erotic film star and then afterwards you can produce erotic films if this doesn't work. After both, you'll be so horny you could do anything!"

*and*

‎"Dear Abby, Every time I go to school I get beaten up by six very tall boys. I have a very big mother and I think it's because I'm ugly. I'm very tired of this, what should I do?"

"Dear X, I think they are right. You should go to the doctor and get a new face. After this maybe this problem won't happen anymore. I hope this advice could help you."

We've been working on thus huge list of vocabulary for the past few weeks that the students are supposed to know by the end of the course. Yesterday to switch things up I decided to send them on a scavenger hunt throughout Rostock in teams to take pictures of as many items in their list as possible and label them with the English words they relate to. I thought this would be a good activity before our vocabulary test that we had today. Anyway, here are some more beauties:

collision

suicide

So that is that. Two weeks left and eight teaching days (the next two weeks are only four days each). I'm definitely excited to get back to Berlin, but my trip to Rostock has been a better experience than I expected and I think this was exactly what I needed to do. Just looking at myself at the beginning of the course and now I see a big difference. Before the course I was having teaching nightmares and now it only really takes me 30 minutes to an hour per night to prepare for my class. Though there are definitely things I would do differently now in retrospect and things I need to work on, I feel like I've become a much more confident teacher and person because of it all. So there!

Next on the list is to find a long-term flat in Berlin...wish me luck! I am so over flat searching!

First Week in Rostock and Couchsurfing in Hamburg

I survived the first week! It's been interesting to say the least, I think I'm finally beginning to get the hang of my routine. Though I normally live in Berlin, my boss asked me if I could teach an intensive English course in Rostock. I said yes, so now I teach 9 students who're currently training to work for Deutsche Bahn as the people who collect and sell tickets, check the tickets on the train, etc. As part of their training they're required to take a 6 week intensive English course. After that, they have to take Swedish and Danish. Crazy, huh?

As such, I'm here in Rostock until November 10th. For those not in the know, Rostock is in eastern Germany in the north. I teach 8 teaching units a day (45 min each), 5 days a week from 8am to 3pm. It is a LOT of class a day and I think we're all still a bit in shock! Sometimes it feels like too much as the students tend to be pretty done with learning for the last hour and a half or so. However, now that we've started to do English trivia at the end the spirits have raised a bit! Since the students are required to take the course, there are 1-2 that seem that have absolutely no desire to learn English and sit on their iPhones while everyone is doing group work, which can be frustrating. However, there are also some really motivated and funny students in the class, so I'll take the good with the bad. Every day gets a bit better as we all get used to so much English all the time!

I was told the students were all beginners, but in reality I have the younger class and they've all had English before. Thus, we're going through the textbook a lot quicker than anticipated and I've spent a long time each night planning my own material. It's kind of exhausting at times to plan for 8 teaching units a day when I get home, but I know I'm going to be a much stronger and confident teacher by the end of it. The first week was definitely up and down, but I'm slowly getting the hang of it and know I'll be happy for this "teaching boot camp" experience at the end! Luckily there is another teaching here with me whose taught these courses for many many years and he's given me a ton of great worksheets and ideas, which I am eternally grateful for.

Did I mention I'm teaching English in the German language? At least mostly. Oh yes. My German has improved so much since I've been here. Sometimes I feel really bad if a student asks me a question about grammar in German and I don't understand, so hopefully by the end of the 6 weeks I'll have my German grammar vocabulary down.

All I have to say is thank goodness for TEFL Worldwide and the internet. There are so many great resources online. Since I only have my own accent (duh) and the students need to practice with as many accents as possible since they'll likely be working with tourists, I can download listening dialogues in British English and the like. The book "Learning Teaching", which I had to buy during the TEFL Worldwide course, has also been immensely helpful. I've been reading that for ideas and advice during several of my "oh my gosh how am I going to teach this?!" freakouts. I still feel like I'm at the beginning teaching stage most of the time, so I tend to obsessively plan my lessons and end up spending way too long worry about every detail. The book sometimes describes me exactly and while sometimes it sucks to realize you made a teaching mistake, it's nice to know I made a normal teaching mistake and have suggestions for how to do it better next time.

First week behind me, I headed into Hamburg for the weekend, which is 2 hours away. It was a 3-day weekend for the reunification of Germany and the weather was absolutely beautiful. I used Mitfahrgelegenheit for the first time, which is basically organized hitchhiking/rideshare. You can buy group tickets here, where it's the same price for up to 5 people. Thus in this area people often buy a group ticket and post on the Mitfahrgelegenheit website to gather up people so we all pay less. I got to Hamburg for a mere 6 EUR and had an awesome ride with three German girls and a woman from Khazikstan who now lives in Germany. We all spoke German the way up and shared some good stories. I learned the phrase "Einmal in, alles din" (literally "one time in, everything inside") from the woman from Khazikstan about how she got pregnant at 17, which is my new favorite German phrase (even though it's a bit grammatically incorrect). I also made a friend in Rostock as one of the girls in our ride group normally lives in the city, so yay! I love that things like this exist in Europe and the community aspect of it all. Not only did I get a super cheap ticket, but met a lot of cool people to hang out with on my ride to Hamburg!

Found this in the train bathroom on the way to Hamburg!

Over the weekend I couchsurfed with two vegan girls in Hamburg. I should also give a shout out to how much I love couchsurfing. I met up with one of my hosts for delicious vegan burritos in the Schanzenviertel, explored, chilled in a park with my Kätt's friends and watched people slack-lining, cooked a nice vegan meal for dinner (and introduced everyone to rice crispy treats with some vegan marshmallows I brought from home) and then ended up a a party at a local dorm. Again, it's so cool that websites like this allow me to go to a city where I don't know anyone and end up in someone's flat, meeting their friends and leaving with new friends of my own.

Chrissie and Kätt (my hosts) with our dinner!

Now on to week two! Before I leave I want to couchsurf in another city in the area and hopefully check out Copenhagen!

Visa Success!

I have finally gotten my visa! My appointment wasn't until October 4th, so I decided to brave the Ausländerbehörde before that because my job needed me to start working sooner (and money is always nice). I woke up at 4:30am on September 12th and made the trek over there. By 5:45am I was waiting outside the doors, an hour and 15 minutes to go before they opened. There were already 6 or so people in front of me and 30 minutes later the line was curving down the pathway. For those not in the know, the Ausländerbehörde is the immigration office in Germany. Berlin apparently has the biggest one in the country, which isn't surprising. In Berlin, all of the language schools (except one that I know of) hire people on a freelance basis. This means you can apply for a freelance visa and are then responsible for buying your own health insurance, paying your taxes, etc. and don't ever work for just one school. On the bright side, you don't owe any taxes until you've earned 8000 EUR and can then deduct all your expenses (i.e. health insurance, transportation, books, etc.) from that. Doing my German taxes sounds terrifying, but luckily I don't have to think about it just yet!

In any case, the Ausländerbehörde is definitely a humbling experience. I am really happy my German is okay because you would be lost there without it. First you have to go stand by the right door, which is decided by which country you're from. When the doors open, everyone RUNS inside to try and grab a number to be seen for a visa. I have heard from terrible storing about people on crutches getting shoved over, etc. but my experience thankfully wasn't so bad. I ran to the second floor, which is where it said I should go as an American on the sign and found the area for my section of the alphabet. Luckily, I got the third number. Then begins the waiting. About an hour and a half later I'm called in and give the woman my documents. These include my application forms, proof of my health insurance, my Anmeldung (proof that you have registered your living place) bank account statements to prove I can support myself,  letters from 2+ schools saying they're interested in hiring me, a monthly budget I created to show I can afford to live there, a letter from one school saying I'd make a certain amount each month, copies of my TEFL certificate, diploma, etc. plus probably 5000 other things. I had researched and obsessed about it all year, so felt pretty prepared when I got there. When the person behind the counter looked through my documents and said, "Na, super!" I let out a sigh of relief. Maybe I will be able to stay in Berlin after all!

Another hour and a half of waiting and they call me back in, give me a card and tell me to go downstairs and pay 50 euros to a machine. When I come up, they hand me back my passport with a shiny visa inside! In less than 5 hours! Success!

Since then I've been teaching a couple Nachhilfe classes, which is basically homework help for kids having problems in English. They're pretty laid back and chill, so I really like them. On Sunday, I'm moving to Rostock in eastern Germany by the Ostsee for 6 weeks to teach an intensive English course. I am pretty nervous about this, as I'll be teaching 8 or so hours a day, from Monday to Friday, which I've never done before. Also, I still haven't found a place to live during this time, so I may just end up in a hostel for six whole weeks. Luckily, my job is paying me a little stipend for living expenses since they really needed a native speaker for this course. I should be a pro by the end of it and will get a lot more practice speaking German, as I don't think there are as many English speakers there. I just have to think of it as facing my fears. I'll be teaching some employees from Deutsche Bahn English for dealing with customers and their jobs. Even the textbook I'm using is written by Deutsche Bahn, which is kind of funny.

I've recently been reunited with all my TEFL Worldwide books and notes, which is perfect timing. When I moved away from Prague, I left them with a friend because I didn't have space. Last January when I was visiting Germany from America, I transported them from Prague to Berlin and just picked them up again here last week. After 2ish years off teaching (except for my volunteer position as a teaching assistant), I feel a little rusty. I forgot how much I did during the TEFL course in Prague! Pretty sure all my notes are going to come in very useful for finding ways to add to my lessons in Germany and refreshing my brain!

Perhaps a post about my job interviews next. Or maybe about how I ordered "vegan almond shits" instead of "vegan almond cookie".  Awkward!

Au-Pair Drop-Out

(credit ukaaa)

Now that I am safely sitting far away in my sublet, I can write about this on the internet. Basically, my au-pair experience sucked. The 5-year old basically had free reign and was allowed to hit me, spit in my face, call me an asshole, hit me in the eye with a foam sword, etc. with very little consequence. I felt the family wanted another older, more responsible child instead of an adult employed by them. They didn't respect my time and though I asked several times and sat down with them to explain that I'd like some kind of schedule so I could make plans and have friends, they just assumed I would stop whatever I was doing for them and generally only told me my hours the day before or the morning of, which just made me really anxious.

Honestly, except for joking around with their oldest son and playing with the cute dog, I started to hate everything about my au-pair job. The first time I visually appeared upset in front of the family was after I cut up some fruit for their 5 year-old and his friend and brought it upstairs. I told them they needed to wash their hands first and they refused and spit in my face. Now I'm not talking cute stick-your-tongue-out whatever, they literally covered me with spit. I herded them to the bathroom, where they still refused to wash their hands and when I went to go help, I got the door slammed in my face. Meanwhile, the Mom was downstairs, doing god knows what, while I was getting completely disrespected by her child. Eventually I just told them, "Alright, if you treat me badly, you're not getting any fruit and I'm going downstairs now". I stormed downstairs, put the plate on the table in front of the Mom and asked, "I don't know what you want me to do! They spit in my face and refuse to listen." Her reply was just, "Do you like kids? They're just being 5 year-olds."

This was the general response. Now let me tell you, if I had ever spit in a babysitter's face when I was a kid, hit someone or was generally as bratty as her kid, my parents would've grounded me for a week, taking away any TV privileges, no friends over, no phone, etc. My parents rarely ever touched us, but when we were bad we generally had to write a LOT of apology letters to whoever we wronged and had a stern talking-to. I said to the Mom, "I know I need to learn how to better deal with him, but what are the consequences when he acts like that?" The answer was nothing. No consequences. Apparently this behavior was completely acceptable and didn't warrant any punishment.

Fuck. That.

I got yelled at for such things as putting the tea cup on the wrong side of the place mat and they made me mow the entire backyard lawn, which is definitely not an au-pair job. When they asked me at a later date if I would mow the front lawn, and I inferred that I would not care to, the mother made it seem like that was preposterous and asked me, "Well, what DO you want to do?!". The last straw occurred as I was attempting to get the lawn mower to work, crying hysterically in their front yard. I think my exact thought was something like "Fuck this shit, I'm leaving." I almost texted the host Mom "I quit" right then and there, but realized I probably needed somewhere to sleep first.

We had a date to talk last Sunday, where it was decided that it was not a good fit and I was leaving. They said I could have until mid-September, which they later revoked this past Wednesday when they told me I had to be out Friday (2 days later). Now, I am a relatively independent person, but there are plenty of 18 year-old au-pairs who don't know anyone in the country, don't speak any German and who have never lived abroad before. The fact that they would just shove someone off like that is absolutely ridiculous.

To add insult to injury, yesterday before I moved out I asked about getting paid. They said they would only pay me for 2 of the 3 weeks I worked, because the last week I was in-and-out looking for jobs and flats. When I explained,  "Well, what am I supposed to do? You told me to get out so I needed time to find somewhere to go!" Her response was that the chores and errands I did for them were payment for being able to sleep there. Honestly lady? You people are fucking rich. I'm pretty sure 70 euro extra for the week would not have broken the bank. My general thought is that them choosing an au-pair that didn't "fit" is mostly their responsibility. They brought a woman over an ocean from America. If they are so particular, they should have asked me more questions about myself, actually taken the time to Skype with me, etc. They fucked up and made a wrong decision and I was left in a shitty position in a foreign country, so I definitely should have been paid for the last week.

Anyway, I'm now happily sitting in a sublet in Kreuzberg, far away from them. After a few interviews, I have a job as a freelance English teacher and am making my first attempt at the visa on Monday morning, so wish me luck! I will be going to Rostock in East Germany for 6 weeks starting September 26th to teach an intensive English course and then coming back to Berlin November 10th, after which I'm staying forever! I'm sure I'll be back some weekends as well. Now I just need to find an awesome flat for November!

I wish I could just find a long-term flat now and stay here, so I could finish getting settled and make some friends, etc. but it will be an adventure, right? And earning a paycheck will definitely be nice.

So get ready for some hopefully less emo posts, now than I have escaped from indentured servitude and am no longer quite as prone to random fits of hysterics! Yes!

How I came from Prague to live in Northampton, MA.

If you read my blog, you know I've been back in America since May. What I don't think I've explained is why. I've been waiting until things were settled before telling. As both of my jobs and my class begin this week and I am sitting in my new apartment, I'd say we're good. So, here's a summarized version of the past year for all of you who are new here:

I graduated from Smith in 2009 and set off in late July of that year for a month long intensive Teaching English as a Foreign Language (TEFL) course at TEFL Worldwide in Prague. The course kicked my ass and I (mostly) loved every minute of it, except being stressed all the time and writing papers on Saturday nights, but it really did prepare me for teaching English. After graduating, I was unemployed and almost homeless for a bit before finding an awesome flat and securing two jobs in Prague. My main job at Excellent Skola said they would sign my work visa papers, but not help with the visa process at all. Let me just mention, that any visa process is pretty complicated and terrifying, but of course this one was entirely in Czech.

After applying to 200+ jobs and attending some 15+ teaching interviews, this was as good as it was going to get so I took it. Lots of people want to teach English in Prague, so there is a lot of competition. They gave me the phone number of a lawyer I could pay to do my visa and he stopped returning my calls, so I found my own. My landlord Jiři liked to take frequent month long vacations to Miami, and as I needed a notarized and signed document and lease that guaranteed me a place to stay for a year, this significantly slowed the already time-limited process. At the end, the lawyer I hired to help was shitty and didn't get my paperwork done in time, nor did she bother telling me she was running behind after an entire month, so the day before my tourist visa was to expire, I found out I wasn't getting my work visa.

This was somewhat okay, because by November, I was stressed all the time. I liked my other job at TeaTime Skola, but my main job exploited me as much as they could. Though I signed a contract agreeing to this exploitation because I was desperate, it got to me over time. There are only so many times I can watch my boss take 30% out of my paycheck for taxes that weren't going to the government (I wasn't on the books) and healthcare I wasn't getting before wanting to cutabitch. Add all the shit they yelled at me for constantly that wasn't my fault, like asking my boss where my class was held because they didn't include it in their e-mail, and I was done with this company. When I had a crying mental breakdown because of a scheduling conflict, I realized I could do better. So, I put in my months notice and my last day was something around December 15th. While I loved Prague, there were some things missing in it for me. I was basically drunk the entire 6ish months I was there and while I do love getting completely schwasted and going to absolutely mind-shattering clubs (see: Cross Club) while dancing to experimental techno music and buying weed in stores behind the bar, I like having at least an OPTION of doing other things. I did not find this option. I'm sure my ideal community was there somewhere, but at that point in my life I wasn't willing to sit at a job I hated to find it.

Plus, my goal was to travel. I had so many friends living all over Europe and no time off to do so as my jobs were barely covering my rent. I figured if I left I wouldn't have to pay rent to begin with and so through some questionable means, I "extended" my tourist visa. I traveled to Poland, Germany, Austria, France, Spain, Ireland and England. I worked on farms in exchange for food and a place to sleep through HelpX, stayed with friends, and couchsurfed (via Couchsurfing.org. You can read about all of those adventures in this blog, but needless to say, even though I ran out of money at the end, got a horrible stomach virus while sleeping in a tipi with no indoor bathroom and came home bedridden with mono for a month, this past year was easily the best year of my life. I met so many amazing people with a similar sense of adventure. People who actually do things instead of talking about them. During my travels, I heard some amazing life stories and bumped into some people who had been traveling as long as 6 years! I made friends on planes, trains, bars, you name it. I felt as if I had really found my "people". It also made clear several things:

1) I want to live in Europe. I am still figuring out how to explain this decision well. There are many levels to this desire that I can explain if you ask, but what it comes down to is this: When I am in America, I find that I spend my time counting down to other days, hoping time flies quickly to the next vacation, adventure, etc. During the two years of my life I lived in Europe, I woke up every day excited about my life and felt generally more balanced between work/leisure.

2) To achieve #1 without being a slave to large language schools my entire life, I need to be at least bilingual. Thus, I have been learning German. While I am not yet fluent, I have been learning pretty rapidly. My education started in January while I was traveling and working on a farm in Germany, but I did not actually begin studying until March. Starting in March, I got hold of a German text/workbook and put time aside every day to do part of a chapter. I can now say, I am pretty much done with the book. Starting in June, I found a private German tutor whom I met with twice a week for most of the summer. She was a huge help and while our first lesson began with me not even understanding how to tell time, our last lesson was conducted almost entirely in German. Through Couchsurfing, I also found a German conversation partner, whom I met with a couple times and became friends with. I am also auditing intermediate German at Smith this year, but I'll get to that later.

This brings us to the now. I decided to apply for a Fulbright grant that will provide me with a job, visa, health insurance, and a travel stipend to teach English in a German school should I win. While I was originally planning to go back to Germany in August, I realized toughing it out in America for the year was worth it for this opportunity. Luckily, Smith College, my alma mater, agreed to let me apply through them even though I graduated, which increases my chances of succeeding and provides much-needed structure and support.

Once I decided to stay in America for the year, I made a choice to move back to Northampton, MA, where I attended university. It's a great little town where I still have some friends, rent is not too expensive, there are lots of lesbians, and endless amounts of coffee and vegan food. I can also audit classes at Smith for $50, so that helps my German cause. Not too shabby. After 2 trips to Northampton over the summer, I found a great apartment right near my favorite coffee place and one of my favorite bars for a very good price. I live walking distance to town, have a big kitchen, two porches, a closet in my bedroom and a backyard. Let me tell you, this was not easy to find. Of the 15 or so places I looked at, most of them were tiny and disgusting or with older women or men trying to replace their children. In one place I wasn't ever allowed to have people over for more than 15 or so minutes. In another, the roommates wanted absolute quiet at all times. Or there were the people that were too hippie for me, and I generally think of myself as a pretty progressive person, so that's saying something. It's all about balance.

Getting a job was much easier and I secured several interviews before I even moved up here. I now work at a small cafe in Haydenville and at Trader Joes. As I have a class 3 mornings a week, it made a 9-5 pretty impossible. I will probably have endless coffee in my life and a discount on awesome food so really things are pretty great. Now it's all about working the kinks out of my schedule as I am currently working 7+ days in a row without a day off starting tomorrow. After not having a full-time job for over a year, this is going to be interesting. Though, I think the variety will help.

My Fulbright application is due to Smith in late September. I've been working on it all summer and I have to say, I don't know how people do this while still in school. It has all been a LOT of work, but so far I've learned a lot about myself and what I want in the process. I've also learned how to write for a grant, which is an entirely different kind of writing from anything I've done previously. Before the end of this month, I have to complete my German language evaluation as part of the process. This is the part I've been shitting myself over. Almost all applicants have studied German in university for at least two years while I only began 6 months ago. I must say, I have a lot more motivation than I had while I was in school, if only because I don't HAVE to do it. And damn, have I studied hard. I know more German than I ever knew of French after 8 years of studying it. I am still terrified though because I'm not sure I've managed to cram 2 years of university-level German into my brain in 6 months. Wish me luck!

That's the general gist of it all. Basically, I am here this year to learn German, apply for the Fulbright grant and refill my bank account. My feelings about being back are mixed, but after my crazy year, it is nice knowing I'll be in the same place for 12 months. In August/September of 2011, I am packing my bags and heading back abroad whether I win the Fulbright or not. Until then, I'm looking forward to another New England fall.

I will definitely have more updates in here during the year, but I figured this post was very overdue.

I Cheated on You, Smith College: SIG Bryn Mawr 2010

Hey hos! Long time, no update. Oops. Here ya go.

I have possibly the best summer job in the world. Not only do I work in that castle above (as well as other castles), I have the coolest co-workers and even get paid to go to the beach (albeit with 80 children). I work at the Summer Institute for the Gifted on the Bryn Mawr College campus in Bryn Mawr, Pennsylvania, which is about 20 minutes from Philadelphia by train. My job title is "Housemaster" and I am, indeed, the "Master" of a "House" for 3 weeks. Well, girls' dormitory. Anyway. I supervise something like 65 girls from 8-16 years old, Residential Assistants and Counselors, working from 7:30am until 11pm and this was my second year running. It is absolutely crazy and this year was 100 times more stressful than last, but I love it. Basically, I deal with homesick kids, kids that don't listen to their counselors, lead off-campus trips and work in the office (delivering kids to and from classes, calling every parent ever, typing evaluations into Excel, etc.). I also get paid to watch things like this:

Matt and Rasheed helping out Hilby the German Juggle Boy

Back in the dormitory, my role is making sure the chillins' don't go completely batshit insane. This year throwing parties in the middle of the day during Rec Hour and such was The Cool Thing. They even sometimes made these cute little invitations for their counselor group.

Matt's understanding of "being in jail" during Capture the Flag

Off-campus trips meant lots of sleeping on buses on the weekends. We have to catch up on our sleep somewhere! Sorry Jon!

All of my awesome coworkers!


By far the most popular act in the Staff Talent Show this year!

As my job is a residential position and the kids are in class during the day, I spend my days in the office. Thus, I saw a lot of the boys' Housemaster, Jared and the Administrative Assistant, Julia. On one of our 2 days off (in 3 weeks, yes) we caught up on the all-important Grown Up Time.

Favorites! We went on an adventure outside of Hope's Cookies.

Jared and I riding cows. We look equally special.

And I'll leave you with this, to sum up what supervising 70+ kids from some 8 countries and 16 US States leads one to do...

Okay, okay, it was already smashed before it made it to my forehead. Is this an American enough picture for you, oh non-American friends? I tried.

Job Shmob.

I have a weird not-cold and am starting to get a bit emo about this whole not having a job thing. I feel like I'm blacklisted. Why doesn't anybody want to hire me? Monies and some type of purpose in my life would be ace.

I'm not really sure what I'll do if I don't find a job before I have to leave the Schengen Zone. All I know is going home is not an option, wherever home is now. Home is a funny concept, isn't it? Because most of the things that've made my various homes, well, home-like, seem to be ephemeral themselves.

I should work on that.

I know what options wouldn't work for me, however. I can't move back to Northampton again until most everyone I know has graduated, lest I end up in one of those nostalic "When I was in college..." comas. Plus, I know Northampton. I love Northampton. It's time for somewhere new. I don't really care to be tied to my past there right now. I should look forward and not back, yes? Moving back to Long Island is not an option, as it only took 5 days last time for me to end up crying in public and convincing myself that everything is wrong in the world, only to find that everything was quite fine again once a safe distance away. I'm not sure how one place makes me so crazy.

Thus, I will show up at schools' doors naked and covered in lesson plans if I have to. Or marry someone. Your guess is as good as mine, then. I still have time.